Bonjour, je suis en terminale et je dois réaliser une rédaction en anglais. Je pense avoir beaucoup de fautes. Est ce que quelqu'un pourrait me corriger ? (il ne faut pas faire attention au nom / prénom)
Si quelqu'un m'aide ca serait super gentil
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Once upon a time, there was a witch named (nom) who lived in a small village where everyone knew each other. At first sight, (nom) was not a witch like the others, she had no warts, no crooked nose, nor sharp nails. On seeing her, she had everything to be considered a normal woman in her thirties. When we gave a physical description of this sorceress to people who didn't know her, nobody thought she was a witch. And yet... the whole village, especially the children, knew not to go to her too often. Going to her house meant that a child had been punished by his or her parents after making a big mistake. Some children went to her more than others but all the children in the village were afraid of her. Yet, when they saw her in the street, she was friendly, even kind, so what was she doing to the children to terrify them? When (prénom), an evil five-year-old child, drew on the walls of the house, his parents decided to send him to (nom). Nothing could be done, he did not want to go there despite his parents' decision. His parents were not worried, in a few seconds (nom) arrived on his broomstick and took the child away from his house. In a fortune-telling ball, (nom) could see all the children's nonsense! When he arrived at her house, (prénom) didn't understand what was going on. A few seconds ago, he was at home with his parents who were overwhelmed by the situation... At first, the child did not recognise (nom) as he had moles, spots and bulging eyes. When she introduced herself, he understood immediately. (prénom) started to cry again out of fear and the desire to return home, so he started to run to get away but the sorceress had prepared everything. When he wanted to open the door, a familiar of the witch prevented him from doing so and brought him back in front of (nom). The little boy was not expecting this and this is when the dialogue between the child and the witch begins.
"So, little child, do you admit that you did something wrong ? »
The stubborn child does not give up and does not answer the witch. She starts to get angry and approaches (nom)
"You decided not to answer me, fine! Now every time you don't answer my questions I'll put a curse on you. »
(prénom) starts to realise the consequences of not answering. He then admits his mistakes
"I'm sorry" he says in a whisper
"It's not an apology I'm expecting! I want you to be forgiven. »
(prénom) replied, asking how he would do it. The sorceress whispered the solution. It seemed to suit the boy and so (nom) let him go home. Before opening the door, (prénom) asked him one last question
"If I do something stupid again, will you come and get me ? »
The witch did not answer him and let her familiar take (prénom) home
Si quelqu'un m'aide ca serait super gentil
-----------------------------
Once upon a time, there was a witch named (nom) who lived in a small village where everyone knew each other. At first sight, (nom) was not a witch like the others, she had no warts, no crooked nose, nor sharp nails. On seeing her, she had everything to be considered a normal woman in her thirties. When we gave a physical description of this sorceress to people who didn't know her, nobody thought she was a witch. And yet... the whole village, especially the children, knew not to go to her too often. Going to her house meant that a child had been punished by his or her parents after making a big mistake. Some children went to her more than others but all the children in the village were afraid of her. Yet, when they saw her in the street, she was friendly, even kind, so what was she doing to the children to terrify them? When (prénom), an evil five-year-old child, drew on the walls of the house, his parents decided to send him to (nom). Nothing could be done, he did not want to go there despite his parents' decision. His parents were not worried, in a few seconds (nom) arrived on his broomstick and took the child away from his house. In a fortune-telling ball, (nom) could see all the children's nonsense! When he arrived at her house, (prénom) didn't understand what was going on. A few seconds ago, he was at home with his parents who were overwhelmed by the situation... At first, the child did not recognise (nom) as he had moles, spots and bulging eyes. When she introduced herself, he understood immediately. (prénom) started to cry again out of fear and the desire to return home, so he started to run to get away but the sorceress had prepared everything. When he wanted to open the door, a familiar of the witch prevented him from doing so and brought him back in front of (nom). The little boy was not expecting this and this is when the dialogue between the child and the witch begins.
"So, little child, do you admit that you did something wrong ? »
The stubborn child does not give up and does not answer the witch. She starts to get angry and approaches (nom)
"You decided not to answer me, fine! Now every time you don't answer my questions I'll put a curse on you. »
(prénom) starts to realise the consequences of not answering. He then admits his mistakes
"I'm sorry" he says in a whisper
"It's not an apology I'm expecting! I want you to be forgiven. »
(prénom) replied, asking how he would do it. The sorceress whispered the solution. It seemed to suit the boy and so (nom) let him go home. Before opening the door, (prénom) asked him one last question
"If I do something stupid again, will you come and get me ? »
The witch did not answer him and let her familiar take (prénom) home
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Réponse :
Hello !
J'ai essayé de corriger ton texte du mieux que je pouvais mais il est possible qu'il reste des fautes... J'ai mis toutes mes modifications en gras.
Il n'y en avait pas énormément dans ton texte de base, tu te débrouilles plutôt bien en anglais ! J'ai ajouté quelques éléments comme des adjectifs et des expressions de sentiments...
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Once upon a time, there was a witch named (nom) who lived in a small village where everyone knew each other. She wasn't a witch like the others : she had no warts, no crooked nose, nor sharp nails. On seeing her, she had everything to be considered a normal thirty-year-old woman. If people who don't know her were given a physical description of her, nobody would suspect she is a witch. And yet... the whole village, especially the children, knew that she was dangerous in some way, and that they mustn't go near her house too often. A child going there meant that he had been punished by his parents after making a big mistake. All the children in the village were afraid of her, yet, when they saw her in the street, she seemed friendly, even kind. So, what was making the children so terrified of her ?
When (prénom), an evil five-year-old child, drew on the walls of the house, his parents decided to send him to (nom). However, nothing could be done : the child refused to go despite his parents' decision. But his refusal wasn't a worry for his parents : indeed, in a few seconds, (nom) arrived on her broomstick and took the child away from his house. But, how did she know she had to step in ? Well, she can see disobedient children through her fortune-telling ball !
When (nom) arrived at (nom)'s house, he didn't understand what was going on. A few seconds ago, he was at home with his parents... And now, here he is, with the mysterious and scary witch of the village. At first, the child did not recognise her as she had moles, spots and bulging eyes. When she introduced herself, the child understood immediately. He started to cry out of fear and his only wish was to return back home. He desperately tried to run away... but infortunately, the sorceress had prepared everything. When he tried to open the door, a familiar of the witch prevented him from doing so and brought him back in front of her. The little boy was not expecting this. (nom) said to him :
"So, little child, do you admit that you did something wrong ?"
But the stubborn child wouldn't give up. He remained silent. (nom) started to get angry at the child's insolent behavior. She approached him and said furiously :
"You decided not to answer me, fine ! Now, every time you don't answer my questions, I will put a curse on you. »
(prénom) was starting to realise that he couldn't stay without saying anything any longer. In a reasonned effort, he finally decided to apologise :
"I'm sorry..." he said in a whisper.
"It's not an apology I'm expecting! I want you to make up to your parents."
(prénom) replied timidly, asking how he should proceed. The sorceress whispered the solution in his ear. Her answer seemed to satisfy the boy. After that, she let him go home. Before opening the door, (prénom) asked him one last question :
"If I do something stupid again, will you come and get me ?"
The witch slightly smiled but did not answer him. She let her familiar take (prénom) home.
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J'espère que je t'ai aidé(e) ! Bonne journée à toi ;)