Bonjour,
Pour demain je dois rendre une rédaction en anglais (niveau 3ème). Pourriez-vous me corriger et me dire si mon texte est cohérent et intéressant?
Merciii
Voilà mon texte:
The Discovery
My name is Andrew. I’m going to tell you the day when I discovered my superpower.
I remember that day. I had an argument with my family. I wanted to get some fresh air, so I went out.
I was walking near a steep cliff, breathing some fresh air, when a gust of wind blew me over the edge of the cliff. I felt myself falling quickly. I wanted to scream, but I couldn’t. The ground was coming up at a terrific speed. Any minute, I was going to crash on the cold stone. But, suddenly, as if time had stopped, a feeling of inner heat swept over me, and I cease my fall. I was suspended over the rock. I didn’t understand what was going on. Could I fly? Apparently yes. Slowly, I returned to land.
In shock, I went home.
My family was in the living-room. My mother was yelling at my father, and my sister was crying. I crossed the room, to go in my bedroom. I didn’t mean to interfere, I had enough argument…
When they sawed me, they stopped speaking and a dead quiet came down on the room.
My parents stood up straight, arms at your side, as if they waited for orders. I noticed that their eyes become translucent. My sister looked at me with her sadistic smile. I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t know what to do.
After two minutes of silence, the eyes of my sister became red and she spoke. Her voice seemed to come of everywhere; I remember exactly what she said: “Even if you can fly, you’ll remain the stupid little boy you’ve ever been. Yes, I knew that you had a superpower. Yes, I got one too. But don’t ask me anything, or I will kill you. Now, go to bed.” And as I didn’t move, as if I was paralyzed, she added: “Right now!”
That night, I didn’t sleep.