Bonsoir quelqu'un pourrait me corriger mon dialogue svp? (Je dois rédiger un dialogue entre Tony et sa grand-mère,Alicia : celle-ci décide de dire la vérité sur la mort de la mère de Tony, comme quoi elle a été tuée par son mari).
The grandmother of Tony, Alicia went round in circles in the lounge, she was very anxious of the reaction of her grandson at the idea of announcing the sad truth on the death of her mother. But she mustered all one's courage and called Tony:
« Tony, can you come in the lounge please? I need to speak to you. »
« Yes, I arrive grandma. » Tony answered.
A few seconds later Tony arrived.
« I’m here grandma. About what do you want to speak to me? » Tony asked curiously.
« About your mother. »
« My mother? » he replied intrigued
« Yes, do you remember of her? »
« Of course, I shall never forget her attractive face, and her soft smile. Even if I was only 5 when she died, I still remember her voice when she came to rock me in the evening. But so why speak to me of my mother? Already 15 years ago she’s no more this world. » He said sadly.
« Yes, she was really wonderful. Eumm… because there is something that you don’t know about her death and I owe tell it to you.» she answered in lowering the head.
« About her death? You mean that she didn’t die in a car accident? » he asked shaking
« Yes, my Tony… » she said crying
Tony began crying in his turn. After a few minutes, Alicia pulled oneself together and resumed:
«Actually, your mother was killed but not as you thought. It’s, it’s… »
After a short hesitation she resumed:
«It’s your father. »
« My father ?! » Tony said shocked.
« Yes… » she answered in a small voice.
« But why ? why did he that ? She was his wife and my mother!! » he yelled crying
« I don’t know, your father has never told it me, but with the numerous indications which I had this evening there, I think that your mother couldn’t it any more live in this situation which you know at present. Given that your father is a gangster, he’s often absent for business, and your mother not wanting that you look like him and that you undergo this life where it’s necessary to hide all the time to avoid the police as well as the enemies, she wanted to run away with you, to offer you a better future than that of the hooligan. But your father returned earlier than planned and has her was a surprise preparing your suitcases and thus included her purpose. Being this one very violating and often under the influence of the alcohol, took his bottle and beat your mother right in the head, what has killed her. »
«My father is a monster!! And he who told me that mom had died from an accident! And she died just to have wanted to offer me a better future! » he yelled.
Tony advanced on his grandmother, embraced her and has thanked her for having informed him. This one began crying and Tony whispered in her ear:
"Don’t worry grandma, my mother will soon be avenged."
Merci d'avance à ceux qui m'aideront !
The grandmother of Tony, Alicia went round in circles in the lounge, she was very anxious of the reaction of her grandson at the idea of announcing the sad truth on the death of her mother. But she mustered all one's courage and called Tony:
« Tony, can you come in the lounge please? I need to speak to you. »
« Yes, I arrive grandma. » Tony answered.
A few seconds later Tony arrived.
« I’m here grandma. About what do you want to speak to me? » Tony asked curiously.
« About your mother. »
« My mother? » he replied intrigued
« Yes, do you remember of her? »
« Of course, I shall never forget her attractive face, and her soft smile. Even if I was only 5 when she died, I still remember her voice when she came to rock me in the evening. But so why speak to me of my mother? Already 15 years ago she’s no more this world. » He said sadly.
« Yes, she was really wonderful. Eumm… because there is something that you don’t know about her death and I owe tell it to you.» she answered in lowering the head.
« About her death? You mean that she didn’t die in a car accident? » he asked shaking
« Yes, my Tony… » she said crying
Tony began crying in his turn. After a few minutes, Alicia pulled oneself together and resumed:
«Actually, your mother was killed but not as you thought. It’s, it’s… »
After a short hesitation she resumed:
«It’s your father. »
« My father ?! » Tony said shocked.
« Yes… » she answered in a small voice.
« But why ? why did he that ? She was his wife and my mother!! » he yelled crying
« I don’t know, your father has never told it me, but with the numerous indications which I had this evening there, I think that your mother couldn’t it any more live in this situation which you know at present. Given that your father is a gangster, he’s often absent for business, and your mother not wanting that you look like him and that you undergo this life where it’s necessary to hide all the time to avoid the police as well as the enemies, she wanted to run away with you, to offer you a better future than that of the hooligan. But your father returned earlier than planned and has her was a surprise preparing your suitcases and thus included her purpose. Being this one very violating and often under the influence of the alcohol, took his bottle and beat your mother right in the head, what has killed her. »
«My father is a monster!! And he who told me that mom had died from an accident! And she died just to have wanted to offer me a better future! » he yelled.
Tony advanced on his grandmother, embraced her and has thanked her for having informed him. This one began crying and Tony whispered in her ear:
"Don’t worry grandma, my mother will soon be avenged."
Merci d'avance à ceux qui m'aideront !
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Tony's grandmother, Alicia,
went round in circles in the lounge (ICI : tu voulais dire quoi exactement ? Que je puisse corriger le sens )
she was very anxious about the reaction of her grandson at the announcement of the sad truth about the death of her mother.
But she had the courage to call Tony:
« Tony, can you come in the lounge please? I need to talk to you. »
« Yes, I'm coming grandma. » Tony answered.
A few seconds later Tony arrived.
« I’m here grandma. What did you want to talk to me about ? » Tony asked curiously.
« About your mother. »
« My mother? » he replied, intrigued
« Yes, do you remember her? »
« Of course, I would never forget her attractive face, and her soft smile. Even if I was only 5 when she died, I still remember her voice when she came to rock me in the evening. But why would you talk to me about my mother? It's been already 15 years ago since she’s no more in this world, He said sadly.
« Yes, she was really wonderful. Eumm… because there is something that you don’t know about her death and I have to tell it to you.» she answered in lowering the head.
« About her death? You mean that she didn’t die in a car accident? » he asked shaking
« Yes, my Tony… » she said crying
Tony started crying at his turn. After a few minutes, Alicia pulled herself together and resumed:
«Actually, your mother was killed but not as you thought. It’s, it’s… »
After a short hesitation she resumed:
«It’s your father. »
« My father ?! » Tony said shocked.
« Yes… » she answered in a quiet voice.
« But why ? why did he do that ? She was his wife and my mother!! » he yelled, crying.
« I don’t know, your father never talked to me about it, but with the numerous indications that I had this evening there, I think that your mother couldn’t live any more time in this situation. your father is a gangster, which means he’s often absent for business